Meeting and Greeting Behaviours

Body Language and Social Rituals

Meeting and greeting rituals are fundamental to human social interactions, helping to establish trust, dominance, or equality within an encounter. Body language plays a crucial role in these exchanges, with gestures, posture, and facial expressions providing nonverbal cues that shape social perceptions. Across cultures, these behaviours differ significantly, yet some fundamental elements seem universal, the role of height (and width/size) being one in terms of its relationship with status

The Role of Submission in Initial Encounters

When individuals meet for the first time or enter a new social environment, they often display behaviours that minimise perceived threat. The ‘threat’ may simply be that many people find initial social encounters awkward, and avoiding eye contact is a common method of limiting interaction, also reflecting an instinct to assess the situation before engaging (Collett, 2003). Collett also suggests that lowering the head is a universal sign of submission, a behaviour that extends to head tilting, which further reinforces deference. The lower the head, the greater the deference.

Upon entering a group situation, individuals may hesitate, awaiting an invitation to join. Small gestures, closed body language, and keeping elbows close to the body indicate uncertainty and a lack of territorial claim. It’s common, for example, for a person, on entering, to cover their ventral region, however fleetingly. Over time, as comfort levels increase, body language becomes more open and expansive.

Gestures such as keeping hands visible and making small movements show non-threatening intent (Fox, 2016).

The Handshake: Trust, Dominance, and Equality

One of the most recognised greeting behaviours is the handshake, the origins of which are often cited as being in Roman society, when individuals grasped each other’s lower arms rather than shaking hands, ensuring no hidden weapons were present (Chaplin et al., 2000). The handshake is likely to predate this (Al-Shamahi, 2021), read my article on Handshakes. Nevertheless, the handshake evolved into its modern incarnation, which serves not only as a greeting but also as an immediate appraisal of intent, trustworthiness, and dominance.

Handshake variations can also influence perception:

A limp or ‘wet fish’ handshake: Often perceived as weak or lacking confidence, though it may sometimes be a deliberate signal of submission (Collett, 2003).
A dominant handshake: The palm turned slightly downward conveys an attempt to assert control. A Roman military variation involved arm wrestling-like grips, where the leader’s hand above the other symbolised dominance.
A submissive handshake: Offering the hand palm-up signals deference, although President Trump uses this before the more dominant act of pulling his partner’s hand close to his own ventral region (a power move).
The double-handed handshake: A favourite among politicians, this involves clasping the other person’s hand with both hands, symbolising warmth but also exerting control (Fox, 2016).
The fingertip grab: Keeps the receiver at a distance, indicating discomfort or lack of confidence.
The ‘leech’ handshake: Prolonged grip intended as a display of control. President Macron is an adopter of this technique.

Chaplin et al. (2000) found that handshake strength varies by gender and personality, with extroverts displaying firmer handshakes, while neurotic or shy individuals exhibit weaker ones. Women with firm handshakes were evaluated as positively as men, particularly in professional settings. Additionally, the moisture and temperature of a handshake contribute to its perception—cold, clammy hands can indicate nervousness, while a firm, warm handshake is associated more with confidence (Fox, 2016).

Facial Expressions and Eye Contact

Facial expressions form a critical component of greeting behaviours. The ‘eyebrow flash’ - a quick raising of the eyebrows – is a contender for a universal expression, often signalling recognition. This micro-expression, like many others, is restricted in individuals who have received Botox treatment (Collett, 2003).

Maintaining eye contact is another crucial factor in greetings, influencing perceptions of confidence and sincerity. However, excessive eye contact can be perceived as aggressive, whereas avoiding eye contact altogether may signal submission or discomfort (Fox, 2016). Yet, eye contact is difficult for many people, for reasons such as social anxiety, autism, and cultural learning.

The Evolution of Nonverbal Greeting Rituals

Many greeting rituals have their roots in evolutionary behaviours aimed at ensuring safety and social cohesion. As mentioned above, open-handed gestures with palms facing upward indicate and in some hunter gatherer societies today, people may demonstrate peaceful intent by extending their arms with open palms, as tribes have done previously (Collett, 2003).

Cultural norms heavily influence greeting rituals, with variations in physical touch, personal space, and verbal exchanges. In some cultures, multiple kisses on the cheek are common, while in others, bowing or nodding is preferred.

For example:

In Russia, kissing on the cheek is often preferred over shaking hands.
The Mormon community values a strong and lengthy handshake.
In Latin America, a mild handshake or abrazo (hug) is common.
In parts of the Muslim world and Asia, men holding hands signals trust and respect (Fox, 2016).

Physical greetings such as hugs, pats on the back, and arm clasps serve to reinforce social bonds. Grooming behaviours—such as adjusting another’s clothing or inquiring about their well-being—originates from communal living, when individuals depended on each other for survival (Fox, 2016). The act of kissing as a greeting may function as a test of an individual’s health, as pheromones exchanged in saliva can influence bonding and attraction (Chaplin et al., 2000).

Conclusion

Meeting and greeting behaviours are complex, deeply rooted in evolutionary and cultural traditions. Whether through handshakes, facial expressions, or gestures, these rituals establish the foundation for social interactions, conveying trust, submission, or dominance. Understanding these nonverbal cues can enhance interpersonal communication, fostering more effective and meaningful connections.

References

Chaplin, W. F., Phillips, J. B., Brown, J. D., Clanton, N. R., & Stein, J. L. (2000). Handshaking, Gender, Personality, and First Impressions. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
Collett, P. (2003). The Book of Tells: How to Read People’s Minds from Their Actions. London: Doubleday.
Fox, K. (2016). Watching the English: The Hidden Rules of English Behaviour. London: Hodder & Stoughton.
Givens, D. (2005). Love Signals: A Practical Field Guide to the Body Language of Courtship. New York: St. Martin’s Press.
Pease, A., & Pease, B. (2004). The Definitive Book of Body Language. London: Orion.